LOLCAT Of The Week: INVISIBLE VIBRATOR!

LOLCATS are awesome and I can't get enough of them. Here is a totally brand new LOLCAT that I put together but can't take credit for since the image and caption were provided by Yasemin who appreciates the lolcats almost as much as I do. Hopefully this makes the rounds and spreads all over the internet. You can easily make your own by visiting the Cheezeburger Factory section of ICanHasCheezeburger.



The picture is an ad for catfood found in a US weekly magazine.

Pop Culture: Paris Hilton Being Released From Prison Today

I know what you are thinking, "a post about Paris Hilton WTF?!" Yeah well this was easy to write about since I actually have a strong opinion on this. I pretty much hate Paris Hilton because she symbolizes for me so much of what is wrong with this world.

This world we live in is all upside down because the "haves" need it to be this way to keep the "have not's" at bay. Let me put it to you this way there are a handful of people controlling most of the world's resources including land, the education systems, governments, law enforcement, armed forces, media, and legal systems through an idea constructed by some men a long time ago called private property.

So a very small number of people own a vastly disproportionate amount of land and other resources and they like to keep it this way and actually make their wealth grow at the expense of everyone else, and what for? Well some have everything so they pursue power; others a life of limitless leisure and pleasure. Sounds like fun eh? I'm sure it is for the few that live that life, such as Paris Hilton.

Paris Hilton is the most recognized poster child for all these super rich kids doing what they want because their families happen to own so much of the world. I don't mean spoiled kids whose parents are worth a few million, I'm talking about the big fish, the whales, the $500 million and up club. At least 2 billion people on the planet have to live in extreme poverty for this kind of inequality to be possible. But it's all worth it for these crazy kids, because they are having a blast.

Paris Hilton is not the worst of them, not by a long shot, she is just one of the most recognizable of them. So much so that she had to be sent to jail, because everyone knows who she is. To be sure other rich kids have gotten away with far worse but this time there was no getting out of it for Paris. She didn't even serve 30 days, but jail is no picnic for anyone. So word on the street is she supposedly going to pull an Angelina Jolie, that is become an activist for humanitarian causes like protecting the environment, helping the homeless, etc. What's going to be Paris cause? Imprisoned women.

She says she is going to do a 180 and stop putting on the dumb blonde act and really be her caring self. I'll believe it when I see it. If she does come through and its phony she will still be a bitch, but at least she will be helping out some people rather than no people. So she wants to help women from ending up back in jail. This is a good cause because the prison system leaves you so messed up that once you get out and serve your time it becomes that much harder to lead a life that can keep you out of trouble. Its damn hard to get a job once you are out of the big house. You become restricted to low paying jobs like Walmart where you will be made to work part time and get no benefits. At that point you might consider taking the risk and maybe steal something from your low paying job. If you get caught you face even harsher penalties. And since you are poor you will get shitty representation provided by the shitty state.

Here's to hoping Paris Hilton can do something for the greater good for once even if it just for PR. I hope it becomes trendy enough to expose this kind of "charity" for what it really is, so it can bring light to all the billionaire so called "philanthropists" that have much more sinister motives in where they donate their plunder.

Follow Up On 70-Year Old Virgin: Too Sick To Have Sex, Death Imminent

My youngest dog who is 10 human years old has had doggy heart disease for about a year. He has been taking medication daily for about 6 months to help combat this and prolong his life. Lately he has been wheezing and unable to complete his short walks requiring me to pick him up and carry him home while my older dog Junior, his dad, pees merrily on the neighborhood trees.

I took Jet to the vet to see whats up with his worsening symptoms. The prognosis wasn't so good. He said he has more fluid in his lungs, and his heart is enlarged. There is not much that can be done now. He will try a new set of drugs that might prolong his life a bit but will cause his liver damage later should he survive more than a year. Basically he said he could die at any moment and that living past this year is unlikely. Now I have to decide if I should let him live out his last days progressively getting worse, or put him to sleep so he doesn't suffer. I kinda would like to see him go out bangin some hot bitch, and who knows, he might just live through it.

Its sad that he has not lived as full a life as he deserved to live. His formative years were spent hiding in the bathroom next to the toilet while all sorts of family drama played out at home. He never got a chance to swim in a pool or a pond. He never got to bang Paris Hilton's dog Tinkerbell. He would have turned that bitch out. He never got to spread his genes into a new generation. He never got a chance to bite a small child whose arm is dangling out the side of a stroller. He never got to pee on a person's leg. He never got to take out a pigeon in the park. Poor Jet, you will be sorely missed. Things just will not be the same without you.

Happy 65th Birthday Paul McCartney: Music Review of Memory Almost Full

Happy belated birthday Paul. Now your 65 but we still love you. This week I'm taking a look at Paul McCartney's latest CD, Memory Almost Full, which has been heavily praised in the research I've done. He is one of my favorite artists ever and I will try to be as unbiased as possible in my review but you've been warned. This is his first album since he left EMI to be the first artist on the new Starbucks label. To start off with I'm not crazy about the cover art. Its a disappointment really.

Please note that I don't give lyrics as much weight as melody, musicality, composition, the overall feel of the song, and how memorable it is. I think music is universal and should be able to communicate without one understanding the language.

The Good

Track 1: "Dance Tonight" (2:52)

First thing about this song is that it reminds me of "Ram On" off of his second solo album titled Ram. It is simple with sparse instrumentation which gives it a very intimate feel until the other instruments come in, making it feel like a party or jam. The but as always the melody is strong and catchy. I believe this is the first single. You can see the official Michel Gondry directed video on YouTube and on his website. The video also stars the always enchanting Natalie Portman.

Track 2: "Ever Present Past" (2:54)

I've heard this song on the radio and it really sounds like Wings era McCartney. I thought it might have been an old Wings song I never heard. Its a bit too much of a happy song, but still very catchy. He's good at writing those but I like it when he departs from that a bit to explore some more complex melodies that might be a bit more melancholy, which is why I loved his last album Chaos and Creation in the Backyard, and consider it far superior to this one despite many of the contrary reviews I've read.

Track 5: "You Tell Me" (3:16)

This is one of the sadder more serious songs I've been waiting for. Too bad it doesn't come until Track 5. I expected this album to be more heartfelt and aching coming off a failed marriage to Heather Mills McCartney. So far this is the best song.

Track 6: "Mister Bellamy" (3:39)

I like the opening piano hook, but like the earlier tracks this just sounds too polished and over-produced like 80's or early 90's McCartney. At times I can see this song being a latter day Beatles song. He should have finished this song as the Beatles would have with weeping slide guitar fills as George Harrison might have played and with some trademark Beatlesque harmonies. It has a sort of pointless outro. This song is interesting though.

Track 8: "Vintage Clothes" (2:22)

I think I hear a melotron on this one. Could it be another masterpiece like Strawberry Fields Forever? Um, no sorry. It does have its moments. Sounds like early Wings which is not a bad thing at all to sound like. I'm not into whistling in a song, but he pulls it off on this one.

Track 10: "Feet In The Clouds" (3:24)

From the start I liked where this was going. A very pretty ballad that also could have easily been a later Beatles song. At times it doesn't go where you think it was going to go, which disappointed me. Paul starts to get a bit prog-rock in the middle but then takes it to an old school rock direction to finish it off. This song has 3 distinct personalities but I wouldn't call it a transitiony song like Radiohead's Paranoid Android. This guy is a master at crafting songs.


The So So

Track 3: "See Your Sunshine" (3:17)

This song is competent but rather forgettable except for the intro chorus. Could have been promising but its lyrics are just too cliche. How the hell do you make an accent on the e? I don't see this going anywhere really. It might grow on me but I kind of doubt it. This is one of his R&B type songs. Skipping to the next track.

Track 7: "Gratitude" (3:17)

This is a bluesy ballad that doesn't quite measure up to his other songs. As always there are some catchy hooks and nice choruses. It's his own fault for raising the bar so high. I don't really look into lyrics but a pet peeve of mine is repeating any one word to death, and that happens in this song with the word "gratitude."

Track 9: "That Was Me" (2:39)

This an old school rock song that is one of those self referential songs in the vein of The Beatles' Glass Onion. I'm not crazy about it musically but it is nostalgic and makes me think about all the great music he's created for us so I can dig this.

The Bad

Track 4: "Only Mama Knows" (4:17)

This song starts off very promising with its strings intro but then it gets "rockin" but in a cheesy way. Another song that sounds over produced from the 80's and 90's. I don't like where the song went after such a promising intro. I don't know if this will grow on me.

Track 11: "House Of Wax" (4:59)

This is a slow song that takes a while to build up. From the start it seems like this will build up to one of those epic type songs he has on almost every album. One of those songs that gets progressively more busy. I'm not a big fan of those generally at least not when he does it. There is a guitar solo in it that is a throwback to his days in Wings. This is a track I will skip next time.

Track 12: "End Of The End" (2:52)

This is actually the first song I heard on the radio one day while driving listening to Breakfast With The Beatles on Q104.3 FM. This song sounds like he's about to die or something. A song he would write about his own death. Maybe the lyrics say something about this. Musically its rather uninteresting so the lyrics are probably important. I'll listen more closely to it later unless I skip this track again.

Track 13: "Nod Your Head" (1:55)

Starts out with an interesting lead guitar but it just doesn't deserve to be an actual listed track. I seriously heard much better unreleased stuff from him that I wonder why he didn't make this into a hidden bonus track. I friggin love bonus tracks! Even the little song within a song you can hear in the "Dance Tonight" video would have been a better ending track. Yea this one is pretty much crap. Sorry Paul.

Overall I would place this somewhere between Flaming Pie and Driving Rain. It has songs that I like and that I think can end up on a future greatest hits record. This is a decent album for him I guess, its hard to top yourself when you have raised the bar so high. This album has its moments but I would have left all the songs on The Bad section as B-sides or online exclusives. I have spent a weekend listening to this album so its a bit early. I might have to post an updated review a month from now when this album has some time to grow on me and I can pay more attention to the lyrics.

On a scale of 1 to 100 (because a 5 star rating system is not fair).

Memory Almost Full scores a biased 77 and is totally worth checking out if you are a big fan like I am.

I CAN HAS PAGE 1 ON DIGG. The LOLCATS Are Officially Taking Over The Internet

Their presence can no longer be ignored. The LOLCATS have invaded the internet and probably your office if it's anything like mine. Just what are these LOLCATS aka ICAN... It's a compound of LOL (laughing out loud) and cats (yea the animals). It is basically an image macro featuring cats. An image macro is an image with text superimposed on it. For some reason these are incredibly amusing, funny, and addictive like fake tans are to guidos.

Some common conventions used are sans serif font, all caps, silly spellings of words (HAI for hi, Bai for bye), exclamations, and many captions start with "IM IN UR VERB, VERBING YOUR NOUN." The caption is basically a speech balloon or thought bubble of the cat in the image or a description of the image. It often reads like baby talk specially since a lot of the cats in the images are kittens. Here is a brilliant LOLCAT example. You can find lots of these on the popular ICANHASCHEEZEBURGER.com and image sharing sites like Flickr and Photobucket.

LOLCATS are an evolution of the O RLY image macros that feature owls. Another similar image macro that can be found often labled as LOLCAT are pictures of walruses with captions about buckets (spelled buckit). There really is no limit to what animal pictures you can use and you need not pigeonhole yourselves to adding text to animal pictures. Here is a great example of an LOLCAT inspired image macro. It doesn't stop there either. It has spawned LOLDOGS, LOLBOTS, and even a new coding language often called LOLcode.

Missing: iRiver 320, Last Seen At The Village Tavern in Manhattan

This weekend has sucked for me. I lost my MP3 player. But it was so much more than a simple MP3 player. It was an iRiver H320, the first portable MP3 player with a color screen. But its not so much that it was an MP3 player, it contained irreplaceable content.

One of my oldest hobbies is writing music and songs. I used to record my musical ideas on a simple cassette recorder, then on a small 4 track recorder, then I moved into the digital age and got a portable Sony mini disc player, then I went on to my iRiver MP3 player which had a built in mic that recorded directly to MP3 saving me tons of space to record my musical ideas (rough demos). Its been working for me since 2004 and it was so handy that I had 2 of them. One of them died on me taking some of my best material from 2005 with it before I had a chance to upload it to my computer. Never again i swore to myself that I would let something like this happen. Of course it happened again thanks to everyones favorite XXX, alcohol.

I need your help readers. I know the item was lost at the Village Tavern which is where it was last seen. It is old and beat up with obvious wear and tear and pretty much useless without its charger. It takes forever to load but it is important to me for the reasons stated above. I must have it back. If you know anyone that has information that can lead to the recovery of the lost device do not hesitate to contact me. Leave me a comment or something. I need that shit back to recover my songs. There is a generous reward for anyone that can help me get it back. This is like the time Eminem lost his notebook of lyrics and freaked out about eventually getting it back by paying out a reward of $1 million dollars. I have nowhere near $1 million but am willing to do all sorts of sexual favors, or hook you up with some drugs of your choice. I kid I kid.

Music Reviews: Queens Of The Stone Age - Era Vulgaris (2007)

It's not often that I get excited about new music. Maybe its that I'm getting older and not as hungry as I once was to discover new music, or maybe its that a lot of stuff out there that reaches my ears just isn't very good (sucks ass). I'm thinking its the latter.

One of the few bands of the modern era (last 10 years) that I really like is Queens Of The Stone Age often abbreviated as QOTSA. These guys led by lead vocalist and rhythm guitarist Josh Homme, rock and often rock hard. Their new album Era Vulgaris is the bands 5th studio album in 9 years. Their lineup is different this time around than in albums past. Most notable is the absence of bassist / occasional singer Nick Oliveri who was fired by Josh Homme in 2004 for beating his wife.

This time around they get some help from Trent Reznor of NIN lends background vocals on the track "Era Vulgaris" which was cut from the album at the last minute. I don't know how much he influenced this album but I can swear there is more keyboards on this album.

The Good

Track 1: "Turnin' On The Screw"
30 seconds into the first song on the new album got me thinking "oh man this album could be ovary smashing good! They did it again!" But my high expectations start to diminish once the vocals begin. Since its hard to maintain that kind of ass kickary for long.

Track 3: "I'm Designer"
Another song that grows on you. Mean and dirty verse with a pretty melodic chorus. This is a common style for the band but is more evident on this album and in particular this song. I'm a fan of that kind of duality in a song. They make it work so its catchy and melodic but badass at the same time. Kind of like a man and a woman becoming one.

Track 4: "Into The Hollow"
This song starts off with a rockin' drum groove then vocals enter followed by lead guitar that is spot on but never overdone. Brilliant song construction. The vocals are very mellow and the chorus is again much prettier than the verses with a good melody. Hooks rule.

Track 6: "Battery Acid"
Damn this song is badass. This is a good song to beat up children to. It reminds one of their early material then comes the seemingly out of place chorus that seems too pretty for this song but fits right in. A short guitar solo follows. This should be a fun song live in concert.

Track 7: "Make It Wit Chu"
This is their R&B piano pounder song. It is more soulful than the other songs and features female background vocals. Its groovy and melodic in an old school way. Kind of like the Rolling Stones. It is radio friendly as well but I doubt it will be a single.

Track 8: "3's and 7's"
Another highlight of this album IMHO, is track 8 "3's and 7's." It starts off with just one guitar (sound similar to Smells Like Teen Spirit) before other instruments are introduced and take it to another place all its own. I love the lead guitar touches on this song. This is a very radio friendly song and I expect it to be a single with a cheesy video as is their trademark.

Track 9: "Suture Up Your Future"
One of the "softer" songs for QOTSA and one of the better songs on the album. Very melodic and ambient in a good way.

Track 10: "River In The Road"
For a band renown for their awesome drum parts this album is not as brilliant as the others drum-wise. It still rocks but is not as interesting. Its much more simplified, except for this song. This is one of their darker songs with not much hook or moment of prettiness. This song lives and dies by the drums.


The Bad

Track 2: "Sick, Sick, Sick"
This song sounds like a bad rip off of Dave Grohl's Foo Fighters' song "All My Life" but nowhere nearly as good. Dave played drums for QOTSA on their best album to date the incredibly awesome Songs For The Deaf.

Track 5: "Misfit Love"
This song is just OK in my book. Its classic QOTSA though, if you like their early stuff. I'm more into the more melodic songs than the attitude songs which this one clearly is. Not that this song doesn't have its moments but it doesn't come around until 4+ minutes into the songs. I'm not crazy about songs that don't really get to the good part (the chorus) until the end.

Track 12: "Run Pig Run"
This is another of those attitude songs I'm not crazy about. It is a dark song that is almost menacing. What do you expect with a name like "Run Pig Run." It's a bit too much for me. Don't get me wrong it has its interesting moments musically. Some lead guitar parts remind me of the Pixies which is a good thing.

Please note I have not factored in lyrics into this review since that is chick stuff. As a musician I'm more interested in musicality, melody, feel of the song, how memorable it is, how the song is put together, the energy, and lastly lyrics.

Overall I would place this somewhere between Songs For The Deaf and Rated R. It has songs that I like and are simple enough to cover. It leaves you wondering why you didn't write that song. I have spent a weekend listening to this album so its a bit early. I might have to post an updated review a month from now when this album has some time to grow on me.

On a scale of 1 to 100 (because a 5 star rating system is not fair).

Era Vulgaris gets an 84 and is totally worth checking out if you are into rock and roll that is not dated in a moment in time like the emo garbage out there.

A Recap: The Sopranos Series Finale "Made In America"

Sunday nights series finale of HBO's critically acclaimed hit show The Sopranos was a big-time disappointment. It's not that it was bad per se its just that we all expected so much more from arguably the best TV drama of all time. Part of it was that my expectations were higher than with most series finale's but thats because the series as a whole was so damn good. The last season was one of the worst if not THE worst season.

Episode 86 - "Made In America"

Highlights

Tony wakes up in the morning gets himself a gun. Meets up with the FBI agent to give him some new terrorist information in exchange for Phil Leotardo's whereabouts, but doesn't get it.

Tony visits Carmela and family at their temporary hideout house. Carmela complains about the smells and how she wants to be back in her mansion. Carmela makes yet another racist comment about AJ's ex fiance the MILF Blanca.

Tony befriends stray cat that freaks out Paulie who calls it "a snake with fur." The cat is good at catching mice and staring at Christopher's picture on the wall at the back of The Bada Bing.

NY crew talks with Phil. Phil is upset they still have not gotten the job done. The NY family sort of suggests making peace with the NJ crew after weeks of trying to track down Tony to kill him.

Tony has a sit-down with prominent Brooklyn captains about squashing the beef between the 2 families. The Brooklyn family acknowledges that Phil has changed. Tony is given the OK to take out Phil, but NY will not tip him off as to where he is.

As expected Phil Leotardo gets whacked after Tony gets a good tip about his wherabouts by the FBI agent Harris (he's been making too many appearances on the show this season). Phil gets shot at a gas station and then has his head run over by his wife's car. Eyewitness vomits at the sight.

Janice talks to Tony about her situation (raising her kid and Bobby's kids). Tony senses she wants to abandon Bobby's kid, since she is after all a bitch. Tony visits Uncle Junior at the psych hospital to make sure he does not let Janice know where his stash of cash is because she will take it for herself and shaft Bobby's kids. Uncle Junior is too far gone to even recognize Tony much less some stash.

AJ finally hooks up with his hottie friend, who we learn is a junior in high school. Score! But as they sit in the car listening to Bob Dylan and then make out the car catches fire because he was sitting idle on top of dry leaves. His yellow SUV blows up. Nissan cringes as Xterra sales will surely plummet.

AJ feels reborn since the accident with the SUV and after much thinking while jogging has decided to join the armed forces. Tony and Carmela don't like the idea of AJ becoming cannon fodder so they propose to him an alternative solution that appeals to his dark side. They get him a BMW M3 and an entry level job on the set of a movie Carmine Jr. is producing.

Tony asks Paulie Walnuts to take over Bobby's crew, Paulie declines saying that the crew is cursed since all the captains to that crew have died. Tony does some Jedi mind tricks on him and Paulie reluctantly accepts the position (spoilers all over the net had Paulie being handed the position of boss).

The episode ends in a diner where Tony arrives and selects Journey's "Don't Stop Believing" on the mini jukebox. Carmela enters as music starts. AJ then arrives right behind a mysterious fellow in a members only jacket (Phil's nephew?). Meadow takes forever to parallel park. She is about to enter, Tony looks towards the door. Cut to black, kill the music. The End. Millions of people all over mistakenly think something is wrong with their cable or TV.

The America Motif

America and the American condition (Americana, perpetual war, the American dream, etc.) is a theme throughout. Phil has his head run over by his wife's car a Ford (made in America) SUV. AJ thinks about joining the US Army to fight terrorism in Afghanistan. FBI agent tips off Tony as to Phil's location. American flags are all over the place. At Bobby Baccala's funeral we hear the younger generation have an all too typical American conversation revolving around such things as the Acadamy Awards and American Idol that symbolizes the rags to riches American dream ideal that is often perpetuated in the United States. Phil's head gets run over by a Ford SUV. The last scene in the diner (how American) shows a man wearing a hat that reads "USA." We also see a family with what looks like Boy Scouts (their kids).

Fun With Google Images: Pwned Animals Edition 1

Yet another awesome set of images showing all sorts of people and wildlife getting PWNED. Special shout out to my international readers out there, from the people in Turkey, Iceland, Russia, and of course my polar bears in Antarctica.

Caption 1:
Caption 2:

Caption 1: Gotta love duct tape.
Caption 2:

Caption 1: I'll take things that are PWNED for $800
Caption 2:


Caption 1: PWNED!!!
Caption 2: Ah, the power of cheese.



Caption 1: PWNED!!!
Caption 2:Say my name bitch!

Fun With Google Images Volume 2: Animal Edition

The premise is simple do a search on Google Images for a particular KW at random and browse through something that catches my eye and write down whatever funny comment I can think of within 20 seconds. Those are the rules. There are usually 2 captions per picture. You can add your own!

Original Caption: Happy Hump Day!
Caption 1: I'm bringing humpbacks back.
Caption 2: Your Caption:

Caption 1: Phone boning
Caption 2:
Your Caption:

Caption 1: Always use protection.
Caption 2: Turtle condoms, now available in algae flavor.
Your Caption:f


Caption 1: Two Finger Discount
Caption 2:
Your Caption:



Caption 1: Real dogs eat pussy!
Caption 2:
Your Caption:

Music Reviews: 40th Anniversary of The Beatles Experimental Album Sgt. Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band

It was 40 years ago today, that Sgt. Pepper taught the band to play.

This past weekend marked the 40th anniversary of what is widely acknowledged as the most influential album of all time - The Beatles Sgt. Peppers album. This 8th studio album by The Beatles was a huge breakthrough at the time and is their most celebrated record to date. The album art alone, designed by Peter Blake, deserves tremendous accolades. This album came out at a time when The Beatles were dissatisfied with the rigors of touring the world especially not being able to hear themselves play amid the screaming fans. The concept was to send a record out on tour instead of themselves. The concept album was actually Paul McCartney's idea.

"'Pepper' was probably the one Beatle album I can say was my idea," McCartney told Rolling Stone. "It was my idea to say to the guys, 'Hey, how about disguising ourselves and getting an alter ego, because we're the Beatles and we're fed up. Every time you approach a song, John, you gotta sing it like John would. Every time I approach a ballad, it's gotta be like Paul would. Why don't we just make up some incredible alter egos and think, 'Now how would he sing it? How would he approach this track?' And it freed us. It was a very liberating thing to do."

To celebrate this milestone many artists are covering songs from the album if not recreating the album in homage. Oasis, Kaiser Chiefs, The Fray and Razorlight and others are among the rock groups getting together to record songs from the monumental album. I will try to cover some songs as well and post them soon. You can find some good Beatles covers on YouTube like Jeff Beck's instrumental rendition of "A Day In The Life."

At the time when the album came out The Beatles were experimenting with a lot of mind expanding drugs in particular LSD and marijuana or as I like to call it my only real friend. I guess sometimes winners do use drugs. By the way you know a woman is cool nowadays if she listens to The Beatles.

Sgt. Peppers Facts

• Two of the original songs written for the album were "Penny Lane" and "Strawberry Fields Forever" but they ended up being chosen as singles by the record company instead.
• Sgt. Pepper Reprise was performed and recorded live.
• The whole album was recorded on a two 4 track recorder run together in synch.
• Not yet available on iTunes.
• 1968 Grammy winner for album of the year.

Cleveland Cavaliers Advance To 2007 NBA Finals To Face San Antonio Spurs

Revisiting Predictions for NBA Finals 2007

A little while ago I wrote a post about how I predicted the Detroit Pistons would beat the Cleveland Cavaliers in the Easter Conference Finals and go on to face the San Antonio Spurs in the 2007 NBA Finals. Well it seems Lebron James didn't like that prediction one bit and decided to drop 48 points in game 5 and go on to lead the Cavaliers to victory at home in game 6. Thank you Lebron for fucking up my prediction and making me look bad, you selfish asshole!

Actually I like Lebron James very much, he is a beast of a player, a true freak of nature at 6'8 and 240+ lbs that can run down the court faster than almost anyone in the NBA. He is the most physically talented player in the league but his teammates are a bunch of underachievers that somehow piggy backed to the 2007 NBA Finals. Maybe I'm not giving them enough credit, but the Spurs are a super experienced team with great chemistry and a great knowledge of the fundamentals of the game, not to mention the intangibles (psychological warfare).

I really used to like the Spurs because they are not flashy but get the job done night in and night out and they do it and done right. But they win championships every other year it seems and I'm sick of it. I always root for the underdog and in this case its Lebron and the Cavaliers.

What it will take to beat the Spurs?

Bruce Bowen is the best defender in the league and he is great at being a dirty player and getting away with it which is a rare talent in itself. He really earns his pay come playoff time almost always having to guard the opposite team's best player (Dirk Nowitzki, Kobe Bryant, Steve Nash, Shawn Marion, Deron Williams, and Lebron James in the 2007 NBA playoffs). Will he be able to contain Lebron? Probably he will. So its up to King James to dig deap and pull off a Michael Jordan performance come playoff time. Look for the Cavs to take Bowen out of the series early either by getting him in foul trouble or just plain old hurting him with a dirty foul (like sticking a foot under him when he is coming down from a baseline 3 point shot so he can roll his ankle). If the Cavs manage to neutralize Bowen, Lebron will average an easy 32 ppg in the finals.

Bruce Bown guarding Lebron James

The Cavaliers young up and coming star Daniel Gibson will have to have another great series to cancel out the Spurs deep and talanted bench which includes Argentinian gold medalist Manu Ginobli (another player good at being dirty and getting away with it). Tony Parker is probably getting some good lovin' from Eva Longoria and not stressing the finals. Updates coming soon.

Star Wars Lightsaber Game For Wii Announced

I read about this on Digg and just had to share it. Lucasarts founder George Lucas has recently told AFP, "a Wii game that lets players wield virtual light sabers is on the horizon." Star Wars nerds everywhere post to their blogs in excitement. A game that uses the wii controller will give players a new kind of gameplay with lots of replay value. Finally Star Wars nerds can pretend to be jedi masters and settle their differences not by their knowledge of the force but by their skills with a light saber. Now I know what you're thinking, "this sounds awesome but how will it work? How do the light saber blades not go through each other?"

I could not find an official answer for this but I imagine there will be some sort of force feedback action. Like when the blades hit each other on screen you will get rumble and sound on the wiimote. A custom wii controller or add on to the wii controller is also very likely. Think of a foamy nerf type blade that will totally not stay rigid when it makes contact. If this happens not only will it give new meaning to the term "sword party" but it will look pretty ridiculous, especially to the opposite sex, thus lowering the chances of any Star Wars nerd to procreate. Going from 10% to 3%, even whole milk has a better chance of getting inside a woman. In any case this new Star Wars game is sure to be a mega hit on the super popular Nintendo Wii.

Mad because he still can't get a Wii.